What to Do When You Feel Lost in Life (But Nothing Is ‘Wrong’)

Feeling lost in life but not sure why? Learn what to do when you feel lost in life—even when everything looks “fine” on the outside. This blog will help you reconnect to yourself, your values, and your next step forward.

→ Grab your free self-reflection guide:  Who Am I Underneath it All? – for the mom who’s ready to feel like herself again.  It’s your first powerful step back to you.

I remember the night like it was yesterday.

The kids were in bed, the kitchen was mostly clean, and I sat on the couch next to my husband—and broke down.

“I feel lost,” I told him. “I can’t think of anything I’m passionate about outside of being a mom. It’s like I don’t know who I am …” 

“If you took away mom and wife, who would I even be?”

That night didn’t lead to a dramatic breakthrough. And it wasn’t the last time I cried about feeling lost in life.

But it did name something I hadn’t quite been able to articulate until then:

→ A quiet ache that shows up when life is full—but you still feel empty.
→ A sense that you’re going through the motions, but not truly connected.
→ A longing for something more—without knowing what “more” even is.

Maybe that’s where you are right now, too.

And maybe, like me, you’ve noticed how that ache lingers quietly in the background—then flares up in unexpected moments.

Like the day a friend told me she’d left her job to become a yoga teacher. She looked so lit up. Alive. Full of purpose.

I smiled for her. Truly, I was happy for her.  But later that night? I cried again.

Not because I wanted her exact path.  But because I didn’t have one of my own and I held a deep fear that I’d never find the clarity I needed…

But I eventually did…and you can too.  

So if you’re a mom, a partner, a woman who’s been feeling lost in life—aching for something more—this is for you.

Let’s talk about what to do when you feel lost in life, especially when nothing looks obviously wrong on the outside.

Why You Can Feel Lost in Life (Even When Nothing Is ‘Wrong’)

Feeling lost in life doesn’t always look like rock bottom. Sometimes, it’s quiet.

Sometimes, it’s hidden behind a well-managed schedule, a calendar full of commitments, or a life that “should” feel fulfilling.

But underneath the surface? There’s a sense of discontent.  A disconnection from yourself.

Here’s why that can happen:

You’ve been in “function mode” for too long.

You’re managing, tending, caregiving, doing—for everyone. But when you’re always pouring out, it’s easy to lose the thread of who you are underneath it all.

You’ve tied your identity to your roles.

Mom. Wife. Scheduler. Caretaker. Short-order Cook.  You have many titles and if you take those away? You’re left wondering who you are as simply, you.

You’ve stopped doing what lights you up.

Not intentionally. Life just got full. And slowly, the pieces that once brought you joy, creativity, expression…a sense of self… faded into the background.

And the hardest part? Everything on the outside looks “fine”, even great.  You have a beautiful life.  So the inner ache feels hard to explain—and even easier to dismiss.

But it’s there.  A quiet signal that something deeper is calling for your attention.

→ If this resonates, you might also enjoy How to Find Yourself Again in Motherhood.

What to Do When You Feel Lost in Life

When you feel lost in life—but nothing is “wrong”—it’s tempting to push that feeling aside.

To keep functioning. Keep showing up. Keep doing what needs to be done.

But this feeling isn’t something to be ignored because it’s a signal.  A quiet invitation back to yourself.

Here’s what to do when you feel lost in life, especially if you don’t know where to begin:

Pause Before You Plan Anything

Before you rush to find a new job, a new routine, or even a new hobby—pause.

Not forever. Just long enough to get quiet and listen to what’s really going on underneath the surface.

Sometimes the most important work you can do is to stop long enough to hear yourself again.

You don’t have to figure it all out right now.  Just create enough space to notice what’s coming up. That’s where your next step begins.

→ If you need help with that pause, this post is a good place to start:  10 Major Benefits of Self Reflection (+ FREE Questions to Get Started Today).

Normalize Feeling Lost (Even When Life Looks Good)

You can have a beautiful family, a full calendar, and a life you’re deeply grateful for…

…and still feel lost.  

Let’s normalize that.  Because too many women carry shame about this.

We tell ourselves: “Other people have it worse.”  We minimize the ache. We pretend we’re okay.

But the truth is:  You’re allowed to love your life and still long for something more.

That just means you’re evolving.

→ If you’ve been wondering what’s really keeping you from moving forward, you might love The Truth About Why You’re Not Going After What You Want In Life.

Pay Attention to the Clues Life Is Giving You

Feeling lost in life doesn’t have to be a “problem” to fix.

It’s a signal.  It’s your inner self asking for your attention. And the clues are usually already there.

That ache you feel is not something to push aside. It’s something to explore.

Start by noticing:

• When do you feel most at ease or alive?
• What have you always been curious about?
• When do you feel most like yourself?

→ Need some inspiration? Here are 5 Surprising Books on Finding Your Passion In Life.  Maybe it will spark something for you.

Give Yourself Permission to Start Small

You don’t need a perfect 5-year plan to begin.

In fact, sometimes that keeps you stuck. Because when the vision is too big, it’s easy to feel like you’re failing before you even start.

But here’s the thing:  Starting small is still starting.

Take a walk without your phone. Journal for five minutes. Try something new just because you’re curious.

You’re not behind. You’re just beginning.

→ If you’re ready for a gentle push, check out How to Reset Your Life – 10 Ideas for a Fresh Start.

Get Honest About What’s No Longer Working

When we talk about a “reset”, that’s not to say you have to completely overhaul everything in your life.

You don’t need to burn your whole life down.  But you do need to get honest about what’s draining you, distracting you, or no longer aligned.

You can outgrow a version of your life—without abandoning the parts of it that you love.

Just start with one thing that no longer fits. What would it look like to release it—or relate to it differently?

→ This post, Mama, You Can’t Do It All: How to Let Go of What No Longer Serves You, might be exactly what you need right now.

Reconnect to Your Core Values

When life feels off, it’s usually because you’re not living in alignment with what matters most to you.

That’s why reconnecting to your values isn’t a fluffy journaling exercise—it’s a foundational step.

Ask yourself:

• What do I care deeply about?
• What do I want my life to reflect?
• Where am I out of alignment?

This one shift can create clarity in ways that might surprise you.

→ Need help figuring out your core values?  This post will help you get started:  The Best Way to Get Control Over Your To-Do List Might NOT Be What You Think

Get Intentional With Your Time—and Your Life

When you feel lost, it’s tempting to just keep going through the motions.  To continue living life on autopilot, without giving much thought to your daily comings and goings.

But what if you chose to intentionally slow down and…

• made space for things that felt meaningful?
• believed you’re allowed to want more?
• chose from a place of how you want your life to feel?

→ To explore that shift more deeply, read Are You Making Time for What Matters Most in Life.

You’re Not Lost. You’re Being Called Back to Yourself.

You don’t need all the answers to begin—you just need a willingness to turn inward and listen. 

That quiet ache you’ve been feeling? It’s not something to fear or fix. It’s an invitation. A nudge from the deeper parts of you, asking to be seen, known, and remembered. 

So pause. Get still. Be honest. And start small. 

You’re not lost—you’re being called back to yourself. And that is a journey worth taking.

→ If this spoke to you, you might love The Return to You™, a private 1:1 coaching experience for the mom ready to discover who she truly is—and finally come home to herself.