Why You Should NOT Focus On Your Goals (but these 3 things instead)

Setting goals in life is important. However, in order to create meaningful change, you should NOT focus on your goals as your top priority, but these 3 things instead.

Happy New Year friends!  It’s hard to believe it’s the first week of January already. Are you tired of hearing about New Year’s resolutions yet and how to reset and focus on your goals?

I used to hate New Years and all the “fresh start” and “new year, new you” sentiments that are pedaled along with it.

New Year’s has always made me feel bad and disappointed in myself. Another year had passed – what had I done and where was I going?

Then the fact that New Year’s was depressing to me, made me feel even worse!

I felt this great pressure that come January 1st, I was supposed to start the new year as a “new me”, or at least a better version of me with shiny new resolutions and goals for the year ahead.

Time to make my New Year’s resolutions! The December version of me was not good enough, but exciting news – come January 1st, here was the chance to start fresh and make a new me….yay!

Thing is, I used to agree that the December me wasn’t enough.  The new year always felt like a cruel reminder of what I already knew –

That I wasn’t living life as the best version of myself.

I was stuck in the same space year after year, feeling lost and incapable of making any lasting change in my life.  I couldn’t find my spark and was living a life in which I did not feel fulfilled.

It also felt like a huge weight was put on my shoulders every new January 1st that I was supposed to set resolutions that could change all that.

What I was seeking was something so much greater than some new year’s resolutions could fix. 

Small resolutions like losing 10 pounds, reading more, or trying yoga were not going to make me feel whole.  Similarly, bigger goals like starting my own business, running a marathon, or buying a vacation home felt unrealistic and unattainable.

But perhaps, the actual goals and how I couldn’t or wouldn’t achieve them is not where I should have been putting my focus.

Related: “The Truth About Why You’re Not Going After What You Want In Life”

3 Things to Focus on Instead of Goals:

When it comes to creating the life you want, of course having goals is important, however putting all your focus on these goals is not necessarily what will get you what you want.

Instead, try shifting your focus to these 3 key elements below and you will see meaningful impact.

1.) Mindset is key.

It didn’t matter how big or small the goal was, I wouldn’t set new years resolutions because I didn’t think I’d achieve them for one reason and one reason only.

I didn’t have the right mindset. So much of what I write about has to do with mindset because I’ve learned that everything begins with this and changes for the better if you can learn to cultivate a growth mindset.  

The reason I always felt that resolutions were futile or too much pressure, is because I didn’t have the mindset that allowed me to believe I was capable of being a person who could create meaningful change in my life.

My limiting beliefs about who I was were keeping me from becoming who I wanted to be. Here’s the thing I failed to understand –

Our personalities are not fixed. We can rewrite our own stories at any point.  Your personality, strengths, interests, all of your basic qualities can be molded and cultivated through your own efforts and experiences.  You just have to adopt a mindset of growth and believe this to be true.

Related: “How Understanding Growth vs Fixed Mindset Can Transform Your Life”

2.) Your choices today make your future.

You also must understand that in order to become the person you want to be in the future and meet the goals you set, you must start making choices TODAY that will lead you in the right direction.  Start behaving like the person you want to be by creating routines and habits that support where you want to go.

How does a person who runs a successful business act? When do they wake up in the morning? How do they manage their time? What do they do to stay healthy? What choices are they making everyday?

We are all inherently capable of achieving what we want in life, so it’s imperative to start making choices each day that will eventually establish the habits you need to become who you want to be.  Consistent daily action in the direction of your goals will lead you there.

Related: “How to Create Routines and Habits that Stick”

3.) The journey is what matters most.

It is important to have goals and work towards them, but realize that the goals themselves and the achievement of the goals are not what matter most.  It is who you become, what you experience, and all you learn about yourself along the way.

The end game is not to hit all the goals you set because if you think about it, there will always be another level you can strive to meet.

My goal may be to start an online business and grow it to create a six-figure income.  When I meet that goal, it will be a great achievement, and I can continue to strive for even more. 

But it’s not the goal that matters. What’s more impactful to my life is the person I will become on the journey to meeting that goal.  

Why You Should NOT Focus On Your Goals

I believe that our purpose as humans is to be constantly learning and growing, constantly evolving.  In this way, we are always becoming the next truer version of ourselves. 

If you are setting goals in your life, big or small, and cultivating the mindset and habits to become the person you need to be in order to attain those goals, then you are always becoming the next truer version of you and there is no need for a “fresh start” or “new you” come January 1st each year.

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